I wish I was brown skinned four shades darker than my birth tone
see for me brown is a color that I can embrace and definitely own
in the world today being brown skinned doesn't always get you play
but so what, I'd still like to be brown skinned even just for a day
As a little girl growing up always looking into the mirror
trying hard to see myself maybe this day a even a little clearer
wondering who was there inside, I needed to ask her why is she always wanting to hide
Him being the spoiled big brother never really bothered me
'cause being the baby I was always close to my mother you see
mom favored her only son and she favored me but I was just one her favorite girls see
she had three
He walked into the bathroom as I pondered on my face
looking for some answers and starring into space
saying "Sis good thing your light 'cause you'd be ugly if you were brown"
being caught off guard heart raced immediately my head fell down
I looked at him not knowing how to react I could only force a simulated smile, a tiny crack
he never knew that I was searching for purpose, he couldn't have known that I was digging deep inside
he didn't know that all I wanted to do is to no longer hide
Of course what he said isn't what I heard,
to my ears he made brown an action word, like a verb
I've carried that scene with me every day and in between,
what did I know then about all sistas' being queens?
Apparently he didn't either broke out the next summer with jungle fever,
ohh a harder lesson learned tsk as a matter of fact
from that day forward he needed to embrace every sista' from high yellow to jet black!
I didn't know then and inch of all I know now but one thing that remains
I still want to be a darker shade of brown!
elg5/12
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